I’m dying - how can I ease the burden on the people I leave behind?
Losing someone can be a difficult and painful experience, and there may be many things that make it hard on the people you leave behind. For example, some people may find it hard to accept that the loved one has gone or struggle with having to deal with practical aspects of the person’s passing, such as going through their belongings.
Others might find it difficult to cope with the overwhelming feelings of grief and sadness, while others might struggle with the feeling of loneliness and isolation. It can also be hard to cope with the sense of uncertainty and unpredictability that comes with losing someone, and the feeling that life will never be the same again.
“A dying person can take the time to say goodbye to their loved ones in a meaningful way”
Every person experiences grief differently, and what is hard for one person may not be for another person. With that in mind, what can a dying person do to ease the burden of the loss of them on the people they leave behind? Here are a few ideas:
Communicate openly: A dying person can communicate openly with their loved ones about their illness, treatment options, and end-of-life wishes. This can help loved ones feel more informed and prepared for what is to come.
Say goodbye: A dying person can take the time to say goodbye to their loved ones in a meaningful way, whether that be through a conversation, a letter, or some other means of communication.
Make plans: There are many practical tasks to be done when a person passes. A dying person can assist by making plans in advance, for their funeral, burial, or cremation, and also express their wishes for their end-of-life care. This can reduce the some of the burden of these task, while giving loved ones the reassurance that they are following their loved one's wishes, and can give them a sense of closure.
Share memories: A dying person can spend time with loved ones, sharing memories and talking about the past. This can help loved ones feel like they are still connected to their loved one, even after they have passed away.
Send posthumous messages: Use Afterwords.life to send messages to your loved ones after you’ve gone, to be with them in voice and spirit. This can include creating an emotional will.
Seek assistance from a death doula: A doula is a trained professional who provides emotional and practical support to individuals and families who are experiencing a significant life event, such as birth, illness, or death. A doula can be an invaluable resource for loved ones who are struggling to cope with the loss of a loved one. They provide a compassionate and non-judgmental presence, and can offer support and guidance through the grieving process.
Seek therapy: A dying person can also seek therapy or counseling to help them cope with their illness and the emotions that come with the end of their life, this can be very beneficial for the family and friends of the person as well.
It is important to keep in mind that everyone has different coping mechanisms and preferences and these measures may not work for all the people. The main thing is to ensure that the dying person and their loved ones are comfortable and that the dying person's wishes are respected.